Where to put the BLAM

RussellLissau

Artist Tim Sale is an old friend and one of the reasons I'm working in comics. Yesterday we had a great exchange on FB about where to put a sound effect, and I want to share it here to get a conversation going.

RussellLissau

I wrote:
.MICKEY: Don't you want to hear my last words?
JOE: I just did.
SFX: BLAM

This is from the Mamet Movie HEIST, one of my favorites.

Tim countered with:

Comics dialogue .MICKEY: Don't you want to hear my last words?
SFX: BLAM
JOE: I just did.

I think the first version punctuates with the BLAM. It's the last thing Mickey ever hears before he dies. In the second version, joes line is post gunshot and is a punch line. But it does work better in a superhero book, I think, because it downplays the violence with a joke.

Thoughts?

JasonAQuest

They're two different scenes, which treat the characters differently. While the second version may be a little "lighter" because the conclusion is the joke rather than the gunshot, it also treats Joe as less of a person, as just a victim.  In the first version Mickey addresses him (not his corpse), and he (very briefly) knows that he's about to die: no negotiating, no stalling, just "it's over".  There's more dignity to that awareness.  At the same time, Mickey has more (evil) depth in the first version.  He isn't just tossing off a quip like an action hero, he's torturing his victim with an existential taunt.

RussellLissau

I think you have this backwards; Joe has the gun.

JKevinCarrier

At the same time, Mickey has more (evil) depth in the first version.  He isn't just tossing off a quip like an action hero, he's torturing his victim with an existential taunt.

That's how I see it too. Putting the "I just did" first means he's talking directly to Mickey -- he really hates this guy, and he's taking a couple of seconds to really twist the knife before he ends it. It's more personal. Putting the "BLAM" first means he's just talking to himself (or the audience) -- it's smug and callous, but less intense.

RussellLissau

Right, Kevin.
As I told Sale, The Mamet version would fit nicely in 100 Bullets. The second version is a bit of a Schwarzenegger line.

JasonAQuest

I think you have this backwards; Joe has the gun.

JASON: D'Oh.  Isn't anyone going to put me out of my misery?
SFX: BLAM
RUSSELL: I just did.

RussellLissau

Aaaaaaaand scene.

BrandonSeifert

Yeah, two completely different effects. In one, the gunshot is the punchline. In the other, "I just did" is a quippy one-liner following a gunshot. I haven't seen the movie so I don't know which one is an accurate representation of it.

RussellLissau

The first.